Smile :-)

It's only within the last couple of years that I was able to start flashing a genuine smile and laugh a real laugh. I wasn't always this "sunny." I was a sad and angry young man during my late teens & most of my 20s. Sad because a lot of people were mean to me. A lot of people bullied me especially when I was still in school simply because they suspect that I was gay. I wasn't even sure if I was gay that time because I was also confused about my sexuality. I could handle the physical attacks, but it was the emotional bullying that really got to me. I was angry at myself because I let these people who weren't even important in my life control the way I live my own life. I had so many regrets. I had disappointed my family, but most of all I had disappointed myself. However, seeing on television a tragic event that took place within the early part of this century clearly made me realize how short life is. That in one instance, it could be taken away from you. It was then that I finally started letting go of the parts of me that carry a lot of pain, sadness and regret. That I should start loving & accepting myself too. I'm happy I made that choice. Now, whenever I look back at the past & the things I've been through, I sometimes still get teary-eyed not because I'm sad but because I'm glad that I was able to surpass my personal "struggles" and has finally started moving on. I thank God for enlightening me and giving me a loving family which I consider my only treasure in this world.

Yes, life is still beautiful regardless of its ups and downs :-)

PS

That's my niece (who happens to be my neighbor. hehehe!) and my youngest sis with me.

This is what we do after getting home from the office.

We change to our comfy home attire (hehehe) and either watch tv or

play some PS2 games. I can't believe my sis is getting married :-)

I had the curtains & carpet taken off from my living room to be washed.

I lost weight bec. I was sick. Anyway, I have an excuse to binge! Yehey! Food here I come! Hahaha!

C&C

It's sweeping the nation! It's the latest craze this monsoon season! If you don't have it, then you are definitely out of touch with the latest trend. I'm talking about C&C or.......cough and colds! Yes, I have them! LOL! It's the IN thing these days, so I (unintentionally) decided to jump in the bandwagon. Nakiuso at nakiubo na rin ako! Hahaha! I'm just staying indoors. Don't wanna infect anyone.

Pero nainspire ako to launch a project. A fashion show in which lahat ng models dapat umuubo at may tumutulong sipon habang rumarampa sa runway. Kleenex lang saplot nila! Title ng show is Look ala Sipone! Very Avant-garde! Yes? Wag niyo na ako kontrahin! Hahaha! I was so "inspired" that I plan to launch a project runway fashion show thingy! The models will only wear Kleenex and they have to dramatically cough & sniff & sob (not cry ok? haha! ) as they walk the runway! Very Avant-garde huh? LOL! :-) Seriously though, I wanna get well soon. God! Stop teasing me and heal me already! Love Ya! ;-)

PS

My MiniDV Cam is fixed. Yehey!

I hope that young guy from G4M is still willing to act in the video. I will never speak

in my videos anymore though because people make fun of my voice

boohuhu! Nahu-hurt tuloy feelings ko. Boohuhuhu. Waaaah! ;-)

No more video blogs. I'm gonna stick to doing short music vids only.

BFF :-)

I have a new dog. Yehey!! His name is "Puppy." Yes, that is his name. Even when he's all grownup he will still be called Puppy! LOL! My former dog "Muymuy" died of old age 3 months ago :-( I'm glad I have a new dog. Actually, my older sister's maid saw this pup wandering the streets. She felt sorry for it & brought it to my sister. When nobody claimed it, my sis gave it to me. Puppy is now my new BFF. Best friends forever unless he bites me, if so I'll give him to my employees and let them cook him! Hahaha! Kidding! Kidding! :-)

Now, my youngest sis who lives with me wants a pet of her own. She wants a pet rabbit. I told her that rabbits are just big rats with better fur. Rabbits also have big red eyes. Scary!!! Nakakatakot!

Aftermath

I had a wonderful weekend. Watched the movie "Transformers." The first half of the film was a little boring but the battle scenes during the latter part were magnificent. Starscream, my favorite decepticon was in the film, so I was happy to see him/it. After watching the flick, Ryan & I went straight to Malate, Manila to attend the Gay Pride events/White Parties. It was my first time to participate in a White Party. I had a great time meeting new people and seeing new faces. I even met some of my cyberbuddies from Guys4Men and Friendster. I met J@e & Bnine from G4M, and Ian II from my Friendster. It was my first time seeing them in person. They were very nice to me. Ryan and I partied the rest of the night away inside BED, one of the more popular bars in Malate. I even ended up taking my shirt off while dancing. Probably because I had a couple of drinks. Hehehe! When we went out of the bar, the sun was already up. It was tiring. It was crowded everywhere. It was a lot of fun :-) I wasn't able to hook-up (what??!!! hahaha!) with some hot guy though because Ryan was not in his best mood (oh no!!!) because his feet were a little sore. Poor baby! :-( There was this one guy that I was interested in but he kept giving me mixed messages/signals so I decided to stop wasting time on him. I just slept the rest of the day/morning away at Ryan's condo. Fortunately I wasn't drooling in my sleep while he took this photo. Hehehe! :-) bagsak! / exhaustion!