14 May 2011

Facebook

Oh the exciting world of Facebook.
It has certainly changed the way we live our lives.


It has so many amazingly wonderful uses. You can you use it to...
1. Stalk your friends and their friends.
2. Stalk your ex and his/her friends.
3. Accept 1000+ friend invites from people you hardly or don't know at all to prove to the world
that you have lots of "friends."
4. Create a second Facebook account to add more random people.
5. Post statements and photos of the stuff you have or recently bought to remind others of the things that they lack.
6. Upload a photo album consisting of a hundred plus pictures of your recent vacation...which nobody will look at.
7. Post about a recent bad experience  (i.e. a heartbreak, a lover's quarrel, a bad day, the smelly guy in the metro rail)  in the attempt to get public sympathy.
8. Use a profile photo wherein you're wearing next to nothing to convince people that you are hot.
9. Post photos of yourself on the beach wearing Bench briefs (Pinoys only) instead real swimming trunks or boardshorts, because you are such a studly catch in your colorful brief huh?.. Yes you are... Yes you are!
10. Quote phrases from the Bible to make people believe that you're a good person.
11. copy/paste a Hallmark greeting card quotable quote to match your emotion for that time. I.E. a heartbreak, a bitter separation, matters of the heart, a new lover.   
12. Post even more photos of yourself for stalkers to steal and use in other websites.
13. Update your status every 15 minutes to prove to the world that you have no life.
14. "Poke" people to death instead of sending actual messages.
15. Add random people in your  list and not communicate with them....ever.
16. Reject friend requests from ugly people thus destroying their self-confidence. Only accept the good looking ones.
17. Post vague statements (i.e. *sigh*  or i'm feeling...never mind, or hay buhay... or kaasar) to attract attention...you attention whore you...
18. TyP3 L@yk d!z to attract a league of jejemons.
19. Press the thumbs up button on your own status and statements.
20. Post a photo of a bag, shoes, calculator, panties, eggplants, miley cyrus, justin bieber whatever and then tag your friends to it...much to their dismay.
21. Constantly invite people to join you in Farmville and other FB games to annoy them.
22. Ask people to try an imaginary application that will allow you to see the people who viewed your profile.
23. Post the location and map of the place you've just checked in to make you look cool, and for stalkers to locate you, and for other people to avoid you.
24. Embed videos that will not play in FaceBook.
25. Post videos of Charice, any barely half-Pinoy Hollywood celebs who cannot even converse fluently in any Filipino language, beauty pageants, and so forth and so on, and then shout out to the world "Proud to be Pinoy!" because Filipinos are so easily proud of the least important matters and they choose to ignore the bigger mess going on in their country.

Oh Facebook, what shall one do...or won't do without you. LOL! :-)

PS
A few days ago. I was checking my blog and noticed that there was a visitor from Chino Hills, CA
on my live traffic feed. Reminds me of someone :-) I'll never forget ADP.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hahaha! Sarcastic?
Love it •_•

JJ said...

Ouch! Tinamaan yata ako. Haha!

Toyo said...

I think anyone of us at one point has been guilty of a thing or two. LOL!

Anonymous said...

i'm gonna miss you dee. :(

Anonymous said...

sana may twitter account ka din n pwede namin ifollow mga blog-readers mo.

Anonymous said...

Likewise. You will always hold a very special place in my heart.

Amboy

Toyo said...

shhh....baka mabasa ni ryan.
baka magselos at hindi na magluto ng masarap. hehehe! kidding!
thanks amboy :-)

Anonymous said...

didn't mean to cause any troubles between you and ryan. besides, he should be secured by now, right? in any event, the better man won your heart :-) best wishes!

Amboy

Toyo said...

i was only kidding!
8 years na tayong magkakilala hanggang ngayon di ka pa rin sanay sa aking sometimes umm...twisted sense of humor. lol!
mwah!

Anonymous said...

i know... 8 years and going strong as friends :-) hope to bump into you in the future. meanwhile, take care and best regards to you n ryan!

Toyo said...

It has been ages since the last time you saw me. I've changed a lot since then.
I can count the number of people I consider as true friends in my two hands, and you are one of them :-)
Alam mo namang takot/cautious ako makipagkaibigan.
Thanks for being a friend Amboy.

Anonymous said...

Rey, it is an honor to be considered as one of your true friends. I am extremely grateful to the Big Man above for giving me the opportunity to know you, to meet you, to ____ you and to allow our friendship grow to a much higher ground.
Thanks for letting me be your "kaibigan" and I promise to be a true kaibigan to the end.

Amboy

Toyo said...

what did you mean by _____? baka mamisinterpret ng iba yun. hahaha!
kidding!
take care amboy. mwah! :-)

Anonymous said...

I should have not written this... I am opening a can of worms. In any case, I wanted to say, to love you. There I said and wrote it. I hope this will not cause any problems for you and Ryan, If it does, please accept my sincere apology.

Amboy

Toyo said...

No worries. Again, I was only teasing you. Ano ka ba? We've known each other for almost a decade na, alam mo naman ang aking sense of humor. Hehehe! Kunsabagay, maski si Ryan minsan naaasar din na sa aking ummm..."unique" sense of humor. LOL!
Mwah! Mwah!
You'll always have a soft spot in my heart and will always be a friend to my family :-)