Thinking Of You...

I wish you could stay, but you're so far away...

so far away....

PS

Feeling a little melancholy today.

Anyway, my hair's getting long. Time for a haircut.

Nocturnal Habit

I'm still hungry eventhough I just finished having my midnight snack a while ago. I workout in the gym at night from 10-12am and afterwards I eat my night snack. I workout in the evening because it helps me fall asleep a lot faster. Helps me fight my insomnia. Working out leaves me hungry though. Hehehe! For my midnight snack, I had 2 porkchops, half a cup of rice, a baked potato with melted cheese, and some "tuyo" which is a filipino dish made up of dried, salted fish. I'm allergic to tuyo but I couldn't resist eating it. I love eating tuyo even if it smells :-) The "tuyo" I had has a spicy sauce. Yummmmy! I also had a pear for my dessert. By the way, tuyo is different from toyo. Toyo in Filipino means soy sauce. Toyo is also a Filipino slang word used to refer to someone who is in a bad mood. Hahaha! I almost forgot, "tuyo" also means dry in Filipino

I'm hungry again! Maybe I'll eat some donuts or some chicken nuggets or that hamburger I bought at Burger Machine late this afternoon. I prefer Burger Machine over McDonald's or Jollibee. Their burgers are a lot tastier and cheaper. I'm not sure if they're cleaner but still...masarap siya! Wendy's burgers are still my overall favorite though :-)

PS

I burned my credit card earlier this week! Nakakainis!! I always end up burning my card when I'm in the mall. LOL! Bigla ko naman kasing binili agad yung shirts. Akala ko sale lahat yung kinuha ko. Naka 4k+ tuloy ako. My gosh! Sisley pa yung brand, sana isang A/X nalang binili ko. Yung type kong white long sleeves na shirt na nasa window display sa A/X sa Glorietta (Talagang sinabi ko yung branch no??? Hahaha!) which was my first choice to begin with. Nakakaasar! Bullshit!! No! It's double bullshit for making a mistake!!!! Grrrrrrrrrr! :-(

Note to self: Rey! Do NOT shop for a month!

Di bale cute naman yung shirt na nabili ko. Yeah right, keep telling yourself that Rey. Oh no! I'm beginning to argue with myself. Hahaha! Haba ng P.S. ko no? ;-)

Long-distance

Ryan (my bf) has recently moved into his new pad. I visited his place earlier this week. I took some pics. He still haven't unpacked yet. I liked it very much. It's a lot bigger than his previous condominium unit. He kept making fun of me saying "siguro naman di ka na mag-iinarte at di na masikip ang condo ko!" that I wouldn't complain anymore because his new place is a lot bigger. Hahaha! The only thing I don't like is the location. He now lives in Makati City, which is quite far from Bulacan. It usually takes me 45 mins. to an hour to drive from my home in Bulacan to Quezon City where he used to live. Now, it will probably take me +/- 2 hours to drive all the way to Makati. I hate driving in the city. I hate the traffic, most especially the unruly bus & jeepney drivers. If you drive in the city of Manila or Makati, etc., you'll know what I'm talking about. I can handle a long-distance relationship (my last relationship was one), but I know he's not used to this kind of setup. Sometimes whenever he feels down because we're apart I phone him & tell/tease him that it's physically beneficial for us because if we're together all the time we'd end up as skin and bones from making love 24/7. LOL! I can't help it, I love sex! Sex is the national pastime of gay men! Hahaha! I told him I had a dream recently wherein the two of us were "baptizing" his new place & to complete the "blessing" a third guy MUST make love to us. A threesome??!! Hahaha! I teased/told him that I could turn that dream into a reality if he wanted me to. He said "you are soooo kinky!" and I replied "more than one year na tayo, ngayon mo lang nalaman?" ("you only figured that out now after more than a year of knowing me??") Hahaha!

PS

I've received several messages asking when I'm to publish a new video. I still haven't had my camcorder fixed. I can't find the damn warranty. I need the warranty receipt so I could either have my cam fixed or replaced. I'll try to make one next month in time for Gay Pride. Yehey!!!! :-)

Infatuation 2007

It's that time of the year when I once again name the men that I have a HUGE crush on! Actually I had nothing significant to blog today so I ended up talking about my infatuations. Hahaha! On 5th place is Rocco. He's cute and is a world-class chef. I love to eat and he loves to cook. Perfect combination if I may say ;-) No. 4 is Gerard. He's such a yummy daddy in the movie "300." Delicious!!!! ;-)Dennis, a Filipino actor is on 3rd place. He seems demure and innocent but underneath that boy-next-door look of his lies a sexy young man. Ryan's on 2nd place. He's a funny guy and a stud at the same time. I love a guy who can make me laugh. I love to laugh. Hahaha! See? I'm laughing now! ;-) And my number 1 crush is Ricky! He's always been on my list. He can sing. He can dance. He's always welcome to shake his bon bon at me anytime he wishes to. Yeah right! Dream on Toyo! Dream on! Hehehe!

PS

To my blog readers (all 4 of you. hahaha) who've been asking when I'm going to publish a new music video/video clip on my youtube channel, I'll probably do one before the end of May. I already have a concept in mind & I'm thinking of inviting 1 of my friends at guys4men.com to be in the vid. His profile name there is revilo1. I think he'll be perfect for the role because he's young, cute & I'm taller than him. I'm only 5'7" tall. I still have to convince the cutey. He's quite shy :-)

Sanctuary

This is my gym. It's not only a place where I workout, it's also where I spend time whenever I'm really stressed or getting a little bit hotheaded. Exercising calms me down and clears my mind.

Speaking of stress, I got annoyed at Ryan (my bf) lately. He asked me to come over his pad last Saturday. I told him that I would come over but that I didn't want to stay there too long because I wanted to go barhopping which I had not been able to do in months. The last time I had a "nightlife" was December of last year. Although I love it here in the province, too much of the same scenery can get a little boring. I arrived at his place around +/- 7:00pm. We had dinner and afterwards he asked if he could take a nap first because it's still too early in the evening, & that I should wake him up around 1:30am. I decided/tried to wake him up around 2:30am instead so that he'll be more rested. He ended up waking around 3:30am.

We left his pad at Quezon City around 4am. We stopped by his office in Makati around +/- 4:20am to get his mobile phone adaptor. It was +/- 4:30am when we arrived at Government Bar, but there was a long line/crowd of people trying to get inside the place & I wasn't in the best mood to fall in line because I was already upset at Ryan for making me wait for hours in his pad while he slept. He didn't even want me to go out while he was asleep so I won't get bored. Getting back at the story, so since it was packed at Government we decided to head to Malate (Bed Bar). By the time we arrived in Malate, it was already +/- 5:00am. To make matters worse, we were pulled over by the police. The cop said that we entered a one-way street although there weren't any signs saying that it was a one-way street. Fortunately the cop was kind & understanding enough to let us go without ticketing us. We arrived at the bar around +/-5:30am. The sun was already beginning to shine. I decided to just have breakfast at Adriatico instead. Afterwards we went home. We accomplished nothing that night. Driving back from Manila to my home here in Bulacan, I didn't speak to him. It was his idea for me to go to the city in the first place & I rarely go to the city. I rarely go barhopping and I whenever I barhop I want it to be with him because he is after all my bf. Naiyak ako sa inis. Minsan lang ako mag-aya to have some fun 'di pa napagbigyan. Treat ko naman. Nasayang lang outfit ko. LOL! And then he got upset at me for not talking to him. Whatever! From now on ikakabisado ko na streets of Manila para next time that I want to unwind in the city, di na ako aasa sa kanya. Hahaha! ;-) In the meantime, I'll just workout in my sanctuary room & get a boost of endorphins out of it so that I'll feel happier and less irritated, and I can smile again the way I'm smiling in the picture. LOL! ;-)

Eye In The Sky

My part of the world. My gosh! I can see our family compound. This is soo weird! I can see the rooftop of my home, the homes of my parents and siblings, our warehouses, and office. I didn't mark my exact location because I don't want some stranger to suddenly knock on the front gate of our compound. People shouldn't divulge too much personal info over the internet. By the way, I wasn't the one who marked the other locations/areas ok?

Witness

My webcam's been with me for 4 years now. It has seen me change physically throughout the years. Watched my weight go up and down. Watched my bangs & hair recede. Oh no!!! My precious hair!!! ;-) My webcam made it possible for me to visually communicate & make friends from people of different backgrounds from different parts of the world, some of which are still in contact with me after all these years although we haven't met in real life. We even exchange gifts during holidays :-)

It was also through one of my internet videochats that I met my current bf. He & I were cyberbuddies before we decided to meet in-person, and the rest was history. Next month we'll be celebrating our 1st year anniversary :-)

Four years had passed. The PC that I first connected my webcam to is now gone. The cramped bedroom I used to sleep in in my parents home has been replaced with my very own bedroom in my very own house. My sister graduated from college a year after the photo of her & I making silly faces in front of the camera was taken, & before this year ends, she'll be married. And my lokong/crazy nephew will be entering high shool as a senior this year. A lot of things have changed yet my webcam still remains with me, witnessing...capturing bits of my life :-)

Videoblog

It's me ranting about things and stuff! Hehehe! My lokong nephew broke my handycam so I was forced to use my webcam :-(

I told you I'll be back! ;-)

more of my vids at http://www.youtube.com/profile_videos?user=toyo925

A More Subtle Version

Ryan wanted a more poignant version of this video so I changed the song and his wish was granted :-)
Yeah, I'm a fan of Celine.

more of my vids at: http://www.youtube.com/profile_videos?user=toyo925

Recap

I made a short clip containing excerpts of scenes that didn't make the final version of my videos, various videoblogs i didn't publish, and personal video messages before I finally delete them from my computer. Video files tend to take up a lot of memory from your PC. Happy New Year!!! :-)

more of my vids at http://www.youtube.com/profile_videos?user=toyo925

Celebrity Look-alike??!!

I got this idea from Chris' Blog.

Interesting results. Hehehe! :-)

http://www.myheritage.com

Gay Life 2: Love

The video was shot in the condominium building where Ryan lives. This is the result of having too much free time on a weekend. Drama namin no? Hehe! ;-)

more of my vids at http://www.youtube.com/profile_videos?user=toyo925

Fruitcake ;-)

Sabi ng mga friends ko, “Wow pare! Pumuputi ka ha!” Sabi ko, “Eh di magpapaya na rin kayo. Sikreto ng mga guwapo.” Hehehe!

While we are on the subject of fruits, I think that avocados are some of the funkiest fruits I’ve ever encountered. I feel weird eating one, not because of its taste. It tastes fine. It’s the smell of the fruit that makes me feel umm…”uncomfortable.”
Do I dare say what in my opinion the smell of avocado is like? Ok! Ok! We’re all adults here anyway. I don’t like eating avocados because they smell like umm…cum. Eww! There! I finally said it! I finally got it out of my system. Avocados smell like the milk of human kindness. Haha! I asked several people if they agreed with me and they just laughed. They said it’s not avocado but “Zonrox” that smells like man juice. Hahaha! I semi-agree with the “zonrox” thing though. Hehe! Thank you for taking the time to read my very unusual yet highly "informative" latest posting. Hoping for your kind consideration. The End.

Yes, I’m sick! I’m Toyo! ;-)

Bohol 2006

A short video clip of my recent vacation in the province of Bohol, here in the Philippines. It was an advanced birthday gift to me by a dear family friend. Usually, once I’ve vacationed at a certain place I wouldn’t be interested to go back anymore because I would move on & try other places I've never been to, but Bohol is such a beautiful place I wouldn’t mind returning in the future. The people are friendly (Bohol Beach Club), the place is calm & is still unspoiled and not overly commercialized.
Umm…please forgive the interpretative dance showdown I did with my sister. She's going to kill me!!! Oh no!!! Hehehe! :-)

I need to get back in-shape. I'm too lazy these days kasi ;-)

ore of my vids at http://www.youtube.com/profile_videos?user=toyo925

Spiky!

A certain person who shall remain anonymous always tells me that I should wear my hair up/spiked. I’m too lazy to style my hair and I don’t like putting on hair gel though. Just this once, I’ll sport a spiked/anime hairstyle. I just got out of the shower. It’s hot in the Philippines you know? I hope that “anonymous” person is happy now ;-) Masaya ka na? I don't wanna smile in the pics because I just ate some chocolates. Hehe!

I don’t like my bod. I want to be more muscular & bigger & bigger like umm..Batista! Hehe! My annoying sinusitis is back. I’m on meds again. Boo! hu! hu! Kawawa naman ako. Nobody's taking care of me. Wala pong nag-aalaga sa akin. Boo hu! hu! :-(

Tribute

I love playing survivor-horror themed video games. I'm especially fond of the Resident Evil, Silent Hill, and Fatal Frame series. This video is my tribute to those games that are a delight to play. Just finished playing Resident Evil 4 & I can't wait for Resident Evil 5 either for the Playstation 3 or XBox 360. I shot this all in my house. Now my nephews are afraid to spend the night there after seeing the vid :-)

more of my vids at http://www.youtube.com/profile_videos?user=toyo925

Road To Recovery

I have been on medication for more than a month now because of my annoying sinus condition. I hate it! I always feel lethargic and I lost weight because of the meds especially during week 2 of my treatment. I had to take a combination of antihistamines and antibiotics. Here’s how my treatment went.

Week 1: prednisone 5mg tablets 3x/day, & an antibiotic capsule (forgot the name) per day

Week 2: celestamine 5mg tablets 2x/day, & 500mg ceporex (antibiotic capsule) 3x per day
Week 3 & 4: 1 lorano tablet per day. i had an allergic reaction to this med. i got zits :-(
Week 5: One 500mg sumapen antibiotic capsule per day.

I’m scheduled to visit the E.N.T. doctor next week. The doctor told me during my last visit that my sinus has already improved. He told me to not use nasal decongestant sprays anymore because that was what made my sinus sick in the first place. I have used nasal sprays for my sinusitis for a long time that my sinus has become “dependent” on it to function “normally.” It was my fault. I’m guilty. I got concerned during my first check-up when he (doc) told me to have it (sinus) x-rayed. Fortunately, the results were negative. I hate going to hospitals. All hospitals (public & private, rich & poor) have that distinct “smell” that I’m not fond of. Below are photos of my x-ray and evaluation report. I erased my last name and the location of the hospital because I don’t want the whole world to find out where I live. People who don't like me & my blog might stalk me or something. Hehehe! Click the pics to enlarge.

Changes

I can't believe I'm already in my 30s. I'm amused at how I have physically changed over the years. I mean if I went back in time, my past self wouldn't probably have an idea of who I am :-) I hope I age well. I'm certainly no "kid" anymore although some people still treat me like one. I am not a kid. I'm already old enough to have a kid of my own if I wanted to...but I don't. I don't have any intentions of having a kid of my own. High maintenance. LOL!

Opinions

Whenever first-time blog readers (particularly Pinoys/Filipinos) of mine send me an email, they always comment on how they thought that I was “brave” for being quite open about my life, particularly about me being gay. I don’t actually consider it as “bravery,” I am just being myself. They (usually the younger Pinoys) also ask me for my input, advice or opinions on how to “come out” and this is often my reply:
“Live your life in a manner that best suits you. Whether you are in or out of the closet is not really that important anymore. What is important is you have accepted who you really are and you try live a decent & productive life in which you don't intentionally step on other people's feet in order to reach your goals and personal happiness. Because in the end, a person will not really be remembered for being gay or straight but by the way he/she has lived his/her life and the positive influence it had on the people around him/her.”
However, I would still prefer to be “out” at least to people who are important in my life (doesn't have to be the whole world) and I already explained why in one of my blog entries :-)

http://toyo925.blogspot.com/2006/03/anniversaries-coming-outs.html

No Worries: Filipino Version

I edited the video my friend made for me. I replaced the original song to make it much more Filipino/Pinoy because I'm not ashamed nor am I afraid to be gay Pinoy man. And if people can't accept me for who I am (and there were people who couldn't accept me because of my sexuality) then it's not my problem anymore. "Tuloy pa rin ang buhay ko." My world will still continue to turn. Life still goes on for me :-)

direct video link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bs_uLy0Lmi0

PS

To my blog readers who constantly email me asking for a new vid, I'll make a new one before the end of the month. I already have a "storyline." I'll be introducing someone in my next vid ;-). The working title of my next vid is....Toying with Toyo. Haha! Just kidding! By the way, I just finsihed updating my music page